Which bird are you?

There's nothing more important in daily life than birds, so I've developed this handy quiz to figure out exactly which bird you are.

1. You're on the London tube, what do you do to keep yourself entertained?

A. Not hold on and try to surf
B. Lose yourself in a good book and try not to think about mice
C. Listen to your phone's music on loud
D. Eat the chicken you found on the floor
E. Look at yourself in the windows

2. What's your favourite sport?

A. Running really fast in a straight line
B. Spectating
C. Snatching someone's iphone and running away
D. American Football
E. Rhythmic gymnastics

3. There's a riot on the high street near your home, do you-

A. Hide under your duvet
B. Sleep through it
C. Smash up Sports Direct
D. Oh I should - wait no, I'll - oh if I - no- um
E. Go the next morning to look at the pretty glass all over the floor. Isn't it strange how you can find beauty everywhere? Isn't life funny?

4. You're planning your next holiday, where are you going?

A. Safari trip!
B. Country retreat
D. All the London sites! Especially Trafalgar Square, don't you just love Trafalgar Square?!
E. Dubai, Dubai looks pretty and shiny!

5. What's your favourite food?

A. A nice lean curry
B. I quite like fast food actually
C. Chips and ice cream
D. I don't really have a favourite, I will literally eat anything
E. Canapes on silver platter please

And the results! 

(Brace yourself for a look into your actual soul)

Mostly A's - You're an Ostrich, you leggy beauty! You like moving fast and sticking your head in the sand.

Mostly B's - You're an Owl, oh wise one. You like killing tiny furry things and are friends with Pooh Bear.

Mostly C's - Congratulations you're a Seagull, you mouthy dickhead. You can surf air currents though, so that's something I guess...

Mostly D's - Yep you're a Pigeon. But unless your answer to question one was 'chicken', you are a Wood Pigeon, nobly plump, noisy and very tasty... 

Mostly E's - You're a magpie. You find beauty in all things which is admirable, you're also a kleptomaniac.